I had a Dr’s appointment the other day for an endometrial biopsy. To do the procedure they have to take a cell sample from your uterus, which means they have to stick, what they call a “Curette or a sharp-edged tool” up your “VV”. Before they started she mentioned that it was going to hurt and most women said it was like having a contraction. Well I’ve never had a baby so not sure what to expect, except that it was going to hurt. I’ve seen women giving birth on TV and it sure didn’t seem like fun, but onward I had to go.
So they put in the lovely speculum, which all women know how much we love that. She starts and can’t get her lovely stick tool in far enough because my “VV” was too small from not having any kids. So in goes a opener which spreads the opening and pinches like hell. Next goes in what I call, “The Bottle Brush with SPIKES!” To get the cells she has to push the “The Bottle Brush with SPIKES!” in and out and round and round, not once but twice! Now we’re not talking just one easy in and out and round and round, but very fast, very forceful with MANY turns and pushes. OMG, I’m so glad I never had any kids because one contraction would have been enough for me to say, “C Section PLEASE!”
The residual cramps came and went for two days, but what a better reason to drink early and plenty.
The Wine Wench
...And This Is Why We Drink™